If you've ever watched So You Think You Can Dance or Australian Idol and listened to the contestants tell their life story, it's as if they knew from the age of three that they were destined to become a dancer or a singer. Many children grow up just like this on their path from a young age and many others finish Year 12 and still have no idea what they want to do. If your child is in the latter group, don't worry, they will find their path and there are lots of ways you can support them to get there.

Maria from Austinmer is one such parent. Her son is studying for the HSC this year. He has no idea what he wants to do and she has no idea how to help him plan for his future. Whenever she raises the topic, he withdraws and becomes agitated.

"Even with all this information on the Internet, the pressure and the fear is the same as when I finished school," says Maria. "I am feeling it all over again as my son goes through it."

Maureen Jones, Chatswood High School's careers adviser, is all too aware of the difficulties parents face at this time. "It's the first big real decision of your child's life," she says. But her advice is crystal clear: "Parents can be guides, but their kids have to make their own decisions."

"Career education is like sex education - you need to start the conversations early," says Jackie Simpson, Career Consultant at the University of Western Sydney (UWS). She suggests parents can help their child get to know their real talents, skills and strengths. The Bullseye guides at www.dest.gov.au/bullseye are visual tools to identify strengths and choose electives.

These conversations could happen as early as Year 8 because students can start to choose elective subjects that will help them in their interest areas, and some HSC subjects are prerequisites for university courses.

All students in Year 10 are given a copy of the Good Job Guide at school www.jobguide.deewr.gov.au and Year 12 students have this website: www.year12whatnext.gov.au.

Schools now offer a greater range of study options from Year 9 onwards. All sorts of subjects that were once only offered at TAFE can now be studied at school and HSC students can even leave school with recognised qualifications. Hospitality, automotive trades, design, children's services, aircraft maintenance and engineering are some of the subjects offered.

Students can choose to include traineeships or apprenticeships in their senior years at school, and are given time to do the 'paid employment' component of their qualification. A list of vocational education subjects offered in NSW public schools can be found at www.det.nsw.edu.au/vetinschools/index.html.

There are lots of great websites out there to help both you and your child. Start at www.schooltowork.com.au which has a section for parents and one for your child.

Most young people actually are after an 'ace day job', so there is a website named just that where you can watch people in action at work they love, www.abc.net.au/acedayjobs. Watch hundreds of videos about getting a trade or skill at www.skillsone.com.au. Even more videos along with fact sheets about specific jobs can be found at www.myfuture.edu.au.

Careers advisers are a link from school to life after school. Students in Years 9, 10 and 12 have contact with the careers adviser often as a set part of their timetable. They can help students choose electives that will match career or study goals and help to set up work experience opportunities. They will sometimes hold information nights for parents and can meet with students and their parents to discuss options.

Ms Jones often has to open students' and parents' minds to the fact that university is not for everyone, even if they get great marks. "If you look at the statistics, only 30% of students go on to university straight from school, [and then] more than 30% of students at university don't make it through their degree," Ms Jones says.

Try to keep expectations realistic and encourage your kids to try before they buy. Opportunities exist for young people to try a field of study they are interested in before committing to it, be they VET courses or a night course at a community college.

Work experience is usually offered to Year 10 students, giving them a chance to see what's really involved in different careers.

Part-time jobs - apart from being a source of income - are also a good place to find out about the world of work. These jobs can often help kids get a start on their career or help them to realise the work they actually don't want to do.

Keep an eye out for open days at universities, TAFEs and private colleges. These are fun days when campuses open up and show the possibilities that studying there offers. You can also find more specific information about courses and find out how well their previous graduates have fared in the workforce. Search for universities, courses and options at www.gooduniguide.com.au.

If you don't want to leave home to go to a careers expo, you can visit a virtual careers expo at www.virtualcareersexpo.com.au.

Jackie Simpson, Careers Counsellor from UWS, suggests shifting the focus from the question everybody hates, to focus on building up your child's 'tools' so that once your child finds their direction, they will be able to make the most of it. These tools include self-reliance, budgeting, self-esteem, the confidence to question, and high level computer skills. These life skills are valued in the workplace whatever they end up doing.

And finally, remember that there are many different paths to a happy life, some straight, some winding. The good thing is, today's study and work environments allow for many possibilities. It won't always be smooth sailing, but your child will make their way in the world if they feel you are there to support them and not pressure them.