The internet has absolutely changed the way kids socialise. It's an amazing place that allows your child to make friends with another teen living on the other side of the world, and to discover differences and similarities.

Just as you'd make some inquiries about new friends that appeared at your front door to spend time with your child, you'll also need to find out about the people they're meeting online.

Of course, monitoring your child's online activities is easier said than done when your child has a computer in their bedroom, with internet access.

While predators are out there, the reality is a very small percentage of kids will come to physical harm through contact with online strangers.

You may have already installed filters to block pornography and inappropriate sites, but knowledge of potential dangers will help keep your child safe on other computers and their mobile phones.

Australian researchers found that children who didn't include photographs of themselves or their email addresses in their social networking profiles were less likely to receive sexually suggestive messages.

But most kids like to have an image of themselves online - and avatars are a great solution. They're cartoon-like characters you can personalise and put on your profile. Better still, they're actually heaps of fun - and often free - to create. Visit www.free-avatars.com.

When it comes to naming your avatar, choose something creative but non-sexual, like "Sk8trQueen", not "Sweet Sexy 16". 

Education and child safety experts recommend your child doesn't use the internet in their bedroom.

Former Victorian police officer and cyber safety consultant Susan McLean explains the dangers: "By virtue of technology the bully not only follows you home but is invited into your house," she says.

More alarmingly, the internet can give the bully direct access to the child's bedroom "the one place that they should be safe".

However, if for some reason the only place your child can study and access the computer is their bedroom, consider options like:

• Leave the bedroom door open, with agreed random visits by parents
• Create a technology curfew. Disable the computer, and remove the mobile phone from the bedroom at a certain time each night.

Another compelling reason to make your child's bedroom technology-free is to allow adequate rest.

Jennifer Hudson, a professor of psychology at Macquarie University says teenagers in particular are prone to sleep problems, which will only be compounded if computers or phones rob them of vital sleep.

"As soon as adolescents start to take an extra half-hour off their sleep to check their emails in bed, or just texting someone (and that's often happening throughout the night), that can lead to an accumulated sleep debt for the week," Dr Hudson says.

"We know when kids don't get enough sleep that impacts on their mental health, their functioning at school and their relationships."

Dr Hudson suggests some strategies to help you make realistic rules your child can agree to and keep.

1. Keep the lines of communication open

Negotiation with your child relies on having a good relationship. The way to maintain your relationship is by regularly spending time together, such as family meal times.

"In our busy lives it can be difficult to find time to spend together, particularly when an adolescent is resistant to that because they believe it's a 'daggy thing' to spend time with your parents," Dr Hudson says. 

By making time for your child, you're also making space for them to tell you about their life.

2. Make it safe to tell

Your child needs to know from the outset that if they are contacted by a predator or are being bullied, they can tell you without fear of losing their internet or laptop access.

The fear of being "cut off" from the online world could prevent your child from speaking up.

3. Decide together where and when technology can be used

Dr Hudson suggests shared problem-solving techniques to get kids onboard with your rules - especially when they hit the teen years.

Tell your child you're concerned about their sleep and their safety, and ask them to help you write down as many solutions as possible.

"When you've both come up with a list, decide which ones you can toss out and which ones you can both live with," Dr Hudson says.

4. Be consistent with rules

 "It's necessary for parents to set boundaries for their child," Dr Hudson says. She suggests consequences for breaking rules could be loss of recreational screen time or other privileges.

5. Get involved and stay in touch

If your child has a Facebook or MySpace page, ask to see it. Google their name to see what they've posted that's publicly available. (If you can see it, anyone can, so there's no argument about respecting privacy.)

Discuss anything you're not comfortable with and suggest how it can be changed.

• Nothing replaces parental supervision and education for kids about cyber safety.
• Set a technology curfew.
• Never give out identifying information such as your home address, school name or telephone number in a public message such as chat or newsgroups.
• If you post photos online, use privacy settings to limit access to people you know well.
• Remind your child that people don't always tell the truth online, and they can't take anything at face value.
• Reassure your child that they can tell you anything, without fear of losing the laptop or internet access.

• If they get a message or email that's threatening they should Stop, Block and Tell:
  

  Stop:
  This doesn't mean stopping the victim's access to their phone or computer. It simply means take a step back and stop engaging with the bully.

  Remember that every perceived criticism isn't necessarily intentional. Not only does the written word rob us of visual cues to get our point across, you can't hear whether the sender intended to convey playful humour or dripping sarcasm.

  Block:
  Block the bully and limit communication to close friends is the next step.

  Save a copy of the comments for evidence, then remove them if possible. The site administrators may do this for you.

  You'll find a step by step guide to blocking bullies on the ThinkUKnow website.

  Tell:
  Tell your child about cyberbullying when they begin socialising online and reassure them that you won't block them from cyberspace if they're bullied.

  Make sure they understand it's not their fault and they're not alone in this.

  Sites like MySpace and Facebook encourage you to report abuse, and have reporting provisions on the site.

  If you believe your child is being bullied, tell the school principal. Whether or not the bully attends the school, your child's peers may be aware of the attacks and may be pressured to join in.
  

• Never click on any links that are contained in emails from people they don't know. As well as sexual content, they could contain a computer virus.
• If you suspect your child has been contacted by a predator, try to save a copy of the chat log (or whatever form the contact takes) for evidence. Call Crime Stoppers 24-hour line 1800 333 000 to make a formal complaint.

Your child will be using computers and the technology for the rest of their lives, and you're in the great position of being able to get them off to a safe, positive start.

For more information on cyber safety visit  The Cybersmart website.