The REAL Sleeping Beauty
Everyone has heard the story of Sleeping Beauty or at least they think they have. The thing is that the story we hear nowadays is not the real story. And so I am here to tell you what really happened.
Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess who lived in a beautiful kingdom full of beautiful people. Right! That’s w the story usually goes! WRONG! Sure there was a princess, but she wasn’t beautiful. She was UGLY! And she was not just ugly on the outside with her snub nose, squint eyes, buck teeth and sraggily blonde hair; oh no, this was the Queen of Nastiness. She enjoyed making other people feel bad and when she did not get what she wanted, she threw a tantrum. She was a BRAT!
You are probably asking yourselves, “Who does this narrator think she is? She’s probably just jealous.”
I am Fairy Number 13. Yes, I know what you are thinking. The evil fairy. Wrong again. But then let’s return to the story…
When the princess was born I was assigned to be her nurse maid. (Well I suppose not everything in life is a piece of cake.) Of course, the king and queen would hear nothing of how ugly their daughter was, and so they spread the word that she was beautiful. When the princess appeared in public she always wore a mask. You can see where the lies originated from.
Well you have heard about how the princess was cursed by the evil fairy after she was born. The curse was that if she touched a spinning wheel her finger would be pricked and she would sleep for a hundred years. Then a handsome prince would ride up the castle and chop his way through all the overgrown trees until he found the princess. He would kiss her and she would wake up and they would get married and live happily ever after.
What a load of rubbish!
There was never a curse. I am not an evil fairy (if there’s anyone who is evil, it was the princess), and no, she did not sleep for a hundred years and get rescued by a handsome prince. The truth is that she had a disorder which called her to fall asleep at the most inappropriate times. She had no control over it whatsoever. (Anyone who has seen the movie Rat Race will know what I am talking about.)
The princess was so embarrassed about this. One day she was giving a very important speech at a very important ceremony when she suddenly fell asleep. The townsfolk could not understand why the princess had stopped talking and started snoring. Then a child’s voice cried out, “Look mummy, the princess has fallen asleep!” The child started to laugh. The laughter spread infectiously, until everyone in the hall was laughing.
The sound woke the princess, and when she realised what had happened she ran from the hall in tears and never showed her face again. To save themselves from embarrassment, the king and queen made up the rubbish you hear nowadays.
So there you have it. Disappointing, I know, but it is the truth! Now why don’t you go and raed a proper fairy tale like Rapunzel or something because as you know, reading Sleeping Beauty is a waste of time!
